“Are who we were as kids”, asks Alessandra Sanguinetti, “our truest selves?” Or, do we create the truest versions of ourselves as we go through life and experience new things? My investigation explores the notion of a truest self in the context of my photographs of girls and young women. Photography’s relationship with the truth is complex. A photograph contains within it a trace of reality - the light that bounced off the real world at the moment of exposure. However, a photograph is not the same as the reality that was photographed. The real world is three dimensional and in constant flux. A photograph is flat and still.
For example, in this photograph by Justine Kurland (Fig. 1) we can see a group of teenage girls in a bucolic landscape. They are interacting with their environment and each other. Firstly, we see a girl lying upright in the bottom centre of this image whose head and torso are hidden by the tall grass surrounding her, making only the top of her legs fully visible to us. Further away from her, in the distance, we can see the rest of the group. There are two girls gracefully hanging off of a large tree that has been positioned in the centre of the frame. To the left, we can see two girls sitting in the grass. One of them is playing with the other's hair. To the right we see two girls standing. One is in her undergarments, whilst the other is half naked and is presumably taking the rest of her clothing off. All the girls seem to be unphased by the fact that their picture is being taken. Most of them are not facing towards the camera resulting in none or only half of their faces being visible. Kurland appears to have orchestrated this photograph to look candid to the spectator at first glance. Furthermore, I’ve noticed that the foreground and edges of the photograph guide the observer's eyes towards the main focus of the image which is located in the middle ground. The tree branches on both sides of the frame and the faceless girl’s legs are pointing to the centre of the image where the rest of the girls are hanging out. This image by Kurland reminds me of Sofia Coppola's films. Both possess dreamlike qualities and have similar colour palettes. It is easy for me to envision these girls moving around and interacting in this environment; it's like a still from a coming-of-age film.
To me this image represents an aspect of girlhood, the intimacy and tenderness you feel in female friendships. When I’m surrounded by other teenage girls I tend to be less aware of the environment I am in and not worried about the way I look, or laugh, or talk because I feel safe and comfortable. I feel that Kurland captures these female relationships beautifully and that is why this image is one of my favourites; it is personal to me.
To me this image represents an aspect of girlhood, the intimacy and tenderness you feel in female friendships. When I’m surrounded by other teenage girls I tend to be less aware of the environment I am in and not worried about the way I look, or laugh, or talk because I feel safe and comfortable. I feel that Kurland captures these female relationships beautifully and that is why this image is one of my favourites; it is personal to me.
My practice as a photographer has been influenced by my taste in films. My favourite contemporary film is “Mommy” , a 2014 Canadian-French language family drama directed by Xavier Dolan. Ever since I watched it for the first time, it stuck with me. The performances, the rawness, the intimacy, the aspect ratio, the soundtrack. Everything was exceedingly well manipulated to engage the spectator and it has been an influence on my photography ever since.
Although most contemporary films are shot in 1.85:1 or 2.35:1 Dolan picked an unconventional 1:1 aspect ratio for the film (example in Fig. 3). I believe that this was a more fitting decision rather than filming in a conventional aspect ratio as it brings the audience closer to the characters. It feels more personal. The 1:1 aspect ratio feels confined, the environment is physically pushing in around you and it is difficult to watch. As the film progresses and the characters are faced with unexpected relationships and obstacles, there is a moment of release where the characters temporarily escape from all the anguish and pain they had previously been suffering from. The character Steve Després physically pulls the frame apart with his hands, opening up the screen into a 1.85:1 wide aspect ratio. Dolan gives the audience room to finally breathe and feel a sense of freedom and hope for the characters. For the remainder of the film the screen then fluctuates from the 1:1 and 1.85:1 aspect ratio, effectively mirroring where the characters are emotionally, physically and financially in their lives. It gives the audience the feeling of claustrophobia that the characters are suffering from but it also shows the open horizon and the extensive possibilities that life has to offer for them. Dolan was talented enough to convey these raw emotions of pain, heartache and ambition when all went wrong with the creative use of the aspect ratio. Dolan’s film ‘Mommy’ has inspired me to think more critically about framing when taking photographs and also how I crop my images in post-production.
Furthermore, I was inspired by the way Dolan uses colour and lighting in ‘Mommy’. Whether he is utilising rich coloured light on faces and skin, or creating desaturated palettes, Dolan fills each shot with colours and complementary tones that vibrate with emotion to tell a story. Prior to watching ‘Mommy’ I was mostly shooting in black and white (Fig. 4) however, when I came across Dolan’s work I began taking an interest in colour (Fig. 5). Previously I was convinced that black and white photography was superior. However, I began to research colour theory which gave me a deeper understanding of complementary and harmonious colour combinations and I applied this to my own work. I was very satisfied with the results and this motivated me to continue experimenting with colour photography.
Although most contemporary films are shot in 1.85:1 or 2.35:1 Dolan picked an unconventional 1:1 aspect ratio for the film (example in Fig. 3). I believe that this was a more fitting decision rather than filming in a conventional aspect ratio as it brings the audience closer to the characters. It feels more personal. The 1:1 aspect ratio feels confined, the environment is physically pushing in around you and it is difficult to watch. As the film progresses and the characters are faced with unexpected relationships and obstacles, there is a moment of release where the characters temporarily escape from all the anguish and pain they had previously been suffering from. The character Steve Després physically pulls the frame apart with his hands, opening up the screen into a 1.85:1 wide aspect ratio. Dolan gives the audience room to finally breathe and feel a sense of freedom and hope for the characters. For the remainder of the film the screen then fluctuates from the 1:1 and 1.85:1 aspect ratio, effectively mirroring where the characters are emotionally, physically and financially in their lives. It gives the audience the feeling of claustrophobia that the characters are suffering from but it also shows the open horizon and the extensive possibilities that life has to offer for them. Dolan was talented enough to convey these raw emotions of pain, heartache and ambition when all went wrong with the creative use of the aspect ratio. Dolan’s film ‘Mommy’ has inspired me to think more critically about framing when taking photographs and also how I crop my images in post-production.
Furthermore, I was inspired by the way Dolan uses colour and lighting in ‘Mommy’. Whether he is utilising rich coloured light on faces and skin, or creating desaturated palettes, Dolan fills each shot with colours and complementary tones that vibrate with emotion to tell a story. Prior to watching ‘Mommy’ I was mostly shooting in black and white (Fig. 4) however, when I came across Dolan’s work I began taking an interest in colour (Fig. 5). Previously I was convinced that black and white photography was superior. However, I began to research colour theory which gave me a deeper understanding of complementary and harmonious colour combinations and I applied this to my own work. I was very satisfied with the results and this motivated me to continue experimenting with colour photography.
Other than using Adobe Lightroom to make slight adjustments to my photographs (Figs 6 & 7), I would describe my images as quite straightforward. I am not keen on manipulating them in any particular way. Because my investigation is mostly based on photographing people, I only use my camera when I have a day planned out specifically for taking pictures. Other than that, when I am out generally and find something interesting to photograph I will use my phone’s camera to capture it. Chance is something I do rely on a lot in my work, even though my shoots are predominantly planned and my subjects are aware of me taking photographs I allow them to select their own pose and move around freely in the space. I feel like this creates a more comfortable space and allows my subjects to be more authentic with their movements and themselves.
Threshold Concept #10 (Fig. 8) allowed me to view my photographs from a different perspective. Photographing my friends has oddly made me feel nostalgic in the present, even though they were only recently taken I feel as if those moments have already slipped away. A part of girlhood is coming to terms with the fact that you are not going to stay a girl forever, photographing girls my age has helped me accept this. I picture my friends at these stages of their lives for the hopes of making this period last longer. These photographs will be records of something that once was, a special moment that was captured and now impossible to recreate.
I have explored taking photographs inspired by Sian Davey’s practice, documenting girls (particularly my friends) and exploring the idea of coming of age and the intimacy in female friendships for example (Fig. 10). Since discovering Davey’s work I have become more conscious of the value of female photographers and how being a woman influences how you photograph other women and portray them within images, women share an understanding of each other meaning that they are able to photograph more authentically. Being a teenager myself and photographing other girls of similar age, I try to get a sense of how they want to be expressed in photographs. That is why I engage with the subjects I’m photographing. We share a conversation whilst shooting as it makes them loosen up and less self conscious. Since I only take photographs of women who are close to me I am aware of how some feel about pictures therefore I take a different approach to each individual I photograph, some may not feel as comfortable as others when given the opportunity to pose however they want to so I advise them on what to do.
I’ve noticed that all my friends and family are more secure within themselves in secluded areas where they are free of judgement. My investigation is about making photographs that capture people as their truest selves. Becoming the truest version of oneself means letting go of all negative connotations and being carefree which happens when my models are given the choice to perform in front of a camera without any judgement or pressure.
Throughout my personal investigation I have become more responsive to my sitters and more flexible in my working practice. Allowing my subjects to move freely enabled them to feel more at ease and allowed me to capture more authentic photographs then I had previously expected to. My photographs aim to capture girlhood minus the insecurities felt during these years and the fear of being perceived in the ‘wrong’ way. When these aspects are taken away I believe it is possible to capture a girl's truest version of themselves.
Word Count : 1656
Throughout my personal investigation I have become more responsive to my sitters and more flexible in my working practice. Allowing my subjects to move freely enabled them to feel more at ease and allowed me to capture more authentic photographs then I had previously expected to. My photographs aim to capture girlhood minus the insecurities felt during these years and the fear of being perceived in the ‘wrong’ way. When these aspects are taken away I believe it is possible to capture a girl's truest version of themselves.
Word Count : 1656
BIBLIOGRAPHY :
Justine Kurland - Girl Pictures (Aperture, 2020)
https://aperture.org/featured/justine-kurland-girl-pictures/
Justine Kurland - Girl Pictures Book 2020
Mommy - Wonderwall Scene (Youtube, 2015)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cfpCRtHQZ6M&t=30s
Threshold Concept #10 - Photo Pedagogy
https://www.photopedagogy.com/threshold-concept-10.html
Sian Davey - Martha (Sian Davey 2018 - 2022)
https://www.siandavey.com/portraiture/w403rn2e450t91joeh8hidrwsolpyv
Justine Kurland - Girl Pictures (Aperture, 2020)
https://aperture.org/featured/justine-kurland-girl-pictures/
Justine Kurland - Girl Pictures Book 2020
Mommy - Wonderwall Scene (Youtube, 2015)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cfpCRtHQZ6M&t=30s
Threshold Concept #10 - Photo Pedagogy
https://www.photopedagogy.com/threshold-concept-10.html
Sian Davey - Martha (Sian Davey 2018 - 2022)
https://www.siandavey.com/portraiture/w403rn2e450t91joeh8hidrwsolpyv